Tantus Zombie Gary O2 Dildo – Sex Toy Review

Well, here we are… the first week of SPOOKY MONTH! What is Spooky Month you ask? Well… it is for those of us who simply can not possibly contain all the magic and horror of Halloween to just one day… its for those of us who need an ENTIRE FRIGGIN’ MONTH to celebrate! Obviously, I am one of those people. So, to celebrate Spooky Month we here at KittenBoheme.com (I say “we” but we all know it’s just me… I just wanted to sound more impressive…) have decided to count down to Halloween by sharing a month full of spooky, scary, magical, and just downright gross sec toys! I have lined up a month of the very best toys to help you celebrate Spooky Month (or Spooky Year if that’s your thing)!

So, without further ado… let’s start the SEX TOY HALLOWEEN COUNTDOWN!

On the first day of Halloween my BOO love gave to me… a Tantus Zombie Gary!

Admit it, you sung that. And now that you’ve sung it, it’s going to be stuck in your head alllllll day! I know, ’cause it’s been in mine… I’ll have to come up with more verses before we drive ourselves mad repeating the same one over and over and over again ad infinitum.

The Zombie Gary is a seasonal skin that Tantus offered a couple of Halloween’s ago that I begged (quite shamelessly I might add) to have when they announced in early November (the time when Halloween abruptly ends and Christmas stuff springs up seemingly out of nowhere overnight) that they still had a couple left. Graciously, they agreed to send me one for my own personal shits and giggles. Now, for the life of me I can not remember if Zombie Gary was offered at all last Halloween season, so I honestly can not tell you if you’ll be able to ever pick up one of these spookily awesome Zombie Gary’s ever again. But the Tantus Gary does exist in its normal, every day, non-spooky (living flesh) colors, so this review is definitely still worth writing! And maybe if enough of you read this review and pick up your torches and pitchforks you can storm their headquarters demand that Tantus bring back the Zombie Gary (okay… maybe don’t do that, but you can ask them nicely)!

Zombie Gary is 100% the same as regular Gary… only just a little bit more on the undead side. Gary’s color is kinda sorta of like the normal Gary’s cream color… only with a deathly (almost translucent) pallor and some darker undertones down the shaft. Sadly, the color is as far as Tantus went with the Zombie theme, unlike the Fleshlight Freaks Zombie Dildo, the Zombie Gary does not possess any rotting flesh or exposed muscle texturing, nothing gruesome or gross (which is probably a selling point for anyone who wants to celebrate the Halloween season without feeling totally squicked out by a horrific dildo). It’s relatively intact flesh just leads me to believe Zombie Gary is a pretty freshly undead corpse dick and has not had a chance to really rot.

As far as I can tell, Zombie Gary has the same dual density body as living dildo Gary (which would make sense… if its just meant to be a zombified version of the original Gary). Tantus’ O2 Dual Density line is meant to be ultra-realistic and mimic a real penis with a material that has a soft, squishy (dare I say fleshy) outside and a harder more “muscle” like core… although you would think that Zombie Gary would be far more rigid than original Gary…you know, due to the onset of rigor mortis in this freshly deceased penis. The dual density material really does manage to create a more natural feel during use, but as far as being ultra-realistic I would actually give that crown to the Vixen VixSkin line (like my Goodfella dildo). The VixSkin toys tend to feel a bit more realistic to me, with a more skin like plush to the toys, but Tantus’ O2 Dual Density line is a very close runner up… also I’ve yet to see a Vixen dildo in any sort of zombie coloring… so… Tantus is winning on that front! Dual Density is a great material and totally worth experiencing at least once!

The Zombie Gary is also pretty realistic in the details. I can see veins, wrinkles, and creases in the skin, just like a living penis (although, since this is a zombie dick I wish there was also some ripped flesh or exposed muscle…maybe a maggot or two… but Halloween brings out the morbid in me… during the other 8 months of the year I do kind of appreciate that Zombie Gary isn’t gross). Anyway, even though this is a “fantasy” dildo, it is still pretty realistic and if you aren’t all that big into actual human penis looking dildo’s you’re going to want to skip the Gary… zombified or not.

In use, Zombie Gary felt very… gentle (which is not what you expect to say about a zombie)… it is a somewhat slender dildo, when inserted it gave me a satisfying feeling of fullness but without that stretching feeling. Size-wise Gary measures in at 1.5 inches in diameter and a generous 7 inches in length… this dildo is tall, slim and dead… every person’s dream dick (Right? That is what we all fantasize about, right?). Even with all the details to the toy, it doesn’t have a whole lot of useable texture, after inserting there are a few ridges in the skin folds that give a very subtle bit of texture that I can feel if I’m paying attention, but that’s about it. I was really kind of hoping I would feel those big, pronounced veins a bit more… but they really just got lost… but they look nice. The silicone has a matte texture that collects lint like its going out of style… I swear, my dog just looks at this toy and POOF it is covered from head to base in dog hair.  Another thing about the silicone is that there is a bit of drag to it, it isn’t terrible (I’ve experienced far worse)… and in fact it almost feels good to have just a slight amount of resistance when I am thrusting the toy in and out, but if drag is not your thing, just lube it up real good. Being a silicone toy, try and use a non silicone lube if you can. I say “if you can” because I have totally used silicone lube on my Tantus toys without any ill effects… but there is always that chance that something could go wrong and I would disfigure a beloved toy… if you are the better safe than sorry sort of person, find a nice water based lube.

I also allowed Zombie Gary to break through my back door (pssst… that means I put it in my butt). The slender girth of the Gary made it the perfect anal toy for me… I don’t like big meaty toys when I’m playing with my butt… I like long and slender. The head of the Gary isn’t quite as tapered as I would have liked, so it took buckets of lube and a lot of relaxing to coax it through, but once it made that satisfying POP and slipped through my butthole… geez… it was like anal heaven. I think I love Gary more as an anal toy than I do as a vagina toy. Everything about it is just perfect for my butt… it has the right length, the right girth, that pronounced head makes itself known while its thrusting in and out… Mmmm… I’M NOT DROOLING! YOUR DROOLING! I definitely recommend Gary if you are looking for an anal toy.

The base of the Zombie Gary does make it totally safe for anal use, which means you can finally indulge in all of those zombie anal fantasies you’ve been having (We are all having those too, right? It’s not just me?) ever since you first watched Dawn of the Dead. Do you want to make your zombie play even more realistic? The Zombie Gary is also harness compatible! You know I popped this puppy into my harness and shambled around my house like an undead pervert. And instead of moaning braaaaaains… it was assssssshooooooles…. and puuuuuussssssy… yeah… strap-on zombie dick is so up my alley, I don’t know how I will ever use another dildo for pegging ever again. This is it. This is who I am now.

Cleaning Zombie Gary is a breeze, assuming Gary didn’t maul and murder too many folks and isn’t covered in blood, guts and gore… all you need to do is give it a quick rinse in the sink or if you think it needs a deeper, hotter clean, you can place it on the top rack of your dishwasher (no soap) and run it through or give it a quick dip in some boiling water. However you decide to clean your Gary just be sure that you are getting those ridges are completely clean. I have found dried up vagina gunk clinging to those skin folds following a particularly lazy washing. Sure… being lazy may feel good… but geez, you’ll kick yourself for it later when you are super horny for some zombie D and instead of riding it hard you are scraping crusty crap out of the wrinkles. Don’t be like me, be better than I am.

I absolutely love Zombie Gary. I think I would 100% love Gary even if he wasn’t a zombie, it is a fantastic toy. I think that the modest girth of this toy will appeal to most dildo users, like I said earlier, it is filling without being overwhelming (though if you crave a good stretch and lots of girth, you may find Gary a bit disappointing… or you could use it as warm up toy) and the dual density silicone material adds a touch of realism you don’t find in most dildos. I really, really, REALLY hope that Zombie Gary finds its way back onto Tantus’ virtual shelves. I think it is a super fun seasonal skin… I am diggin’ the whole zombie vibe. I’m with Tina Belcher on this one… “I have a complicated relationship with zombies. They’re dangerous but I love their swagger.”

I know you can’t pick up a Zombie Gary… but maybe if you buy a real Gary and wait a few years, it will die and reanimate as a Zombie Gary? I’m pretty sure that is how zombie dildos are made. If you are just looking for a fantastic dual density dildo and aren’t bothered by it being not undead (un-undead?) then you can shamble over to Tantus and pick up an original Gary O2 in one of three non-dead colors (cream, mocha, and cocoa)!

The Tantus Zombie Gary was provided to me free of charge by Tantus as a gift. No review was expected.